Feedback Is My Favorite “F” Word
In the day and age of trying to improve programs, feedback can be the new “F” word. It can be uncomfortable, even hurtful, but it is the very ingredient we need to grow our programs, and more importantly to thrive as managers.
1. You have to ask for it. If you never ask the people whom you manage for feedback you are making a grave mistake. Especially if you manage volunteers. Volunteers have the luxury of voting with their feet. Meaning, if they don’t like something about your program, they can just stop showing up. You end up wracking your brain as to why your program seems to be a revolving door and keep spinning your wheels because you are making assumptions that everything is fine. Send out an ANONYMOUS survey, provide a suggestion box, whatever you do, in order for your program to grow and strengthen, you must ask for feedback.
2. Prepare yourself mentally. After you have sent out a survey or checked the suggestion box, prepare yourself mentally and emotionally for what you may read. I used to just open the results and start reading them only to be hurt to the core or be simply shocked. Then I found myself for the next 30 minutes trying to recover from it. Have a set time to read your feedback so should in case you need some time to recover you have it. Sometimes feedback can come at you like a sucker punch, but if you set aside time and prepare yourself mentally, you can avoiding any potential blows by learning to “duck” (like in boxing when you see a punch coming and duck so you don’t get punched in the face or gut).
3. Feedback isn’t necessarily a reflection of you. Sometimes the feedback that you receive can be more about the organization or (in the case of managing volunteers) how others treat your team members. Volunteers can believe that you, as their manager, are the bee’s knees, but they may not be treated so kindly by others in the organization. Most volunteers, because they do not want to speak ill of someone, or may feel as though they are tattling, will just stop showing up. If you never get that feedback, you can’t find win / win solutions for both the volunteer and others in the organization. Most times, it is a misunderstanding, but if you don’t get to the bottom of it, it can snowball into a larger issue.
4. Sometimes the feedback is about you. Ok. Here it is. Sometimes the truth hurts. Sometimes you will get feedback that cuts like a knife, even though it is given constructively. Many times, especially if it anonymous however, it won’t be constructive, so be prepared for it. There are two things you can do with this; you can either allow your feelings to be hurt and wallow in it, or you can take it for what it is, test to see if there is any validity in it and make changes to improve. This is a sign of growing; they are called growing pains for a reason.
5. The great thing is, sometimes the feedback is about you. The beautiful thing is, not all the feedback will be negative. There will be many people who sing your praises, compliment you and speak very highly of your efforts and your program. Sometimes, even unsolicited! When you get those, let them be a reminder that you are doing a good job, and if you are doing the absolute best that you can with what you have, it is enough. Print those out and put them up on the wall next to your desk, or tuck them away in a “Good Things” file on your computer so you can refer to them on a day when things may not be going so well and you need a dose of encouragement.
6. All feedback is valuable: If you send out a survey and anyone fills it out, be grateful for it. The fact that people took time to provide you feedback is fantastic. Some people are simply just waiting to be asked to share their thoughts, others may have not even thought of it, but since you asked, they think “Well why not?” A lot of people won’t share their thoughts, so be grateful to those who do, even if it is negative or harsh. Feedback is just the tool. How you use it, what you do with it, is up to you.
7. Communicate the results: Part of enticing people to give their feedback is acknowledging that they have been heard. A lot of people won’t fill out a survey because they feel it isn’t really going to make a difference. So be sure to communicate out that it has been received and they have been heard. Then, any suggestions that can be implemented, DO SO. Any great suggestions that can’t be acted upon immediately, communicate that it was a great idea to be considered in the future. Whatever you do, acknowledge it.
8. Remember, you can’t please all the people all the time. The thing about feedback is everyone has an opinion and you can’t please all the people all the time So, you have to be sober. You can’t let the praise get to your head and you can’t let the criticism get to your heart. Keeping in mind that you asked for feedback for the sake of improving is absolutely vital. Looking at it through this lens will help you sift through those suggestions that can help you improve as a leader (even the harsh ones) and improve your program. These are the stepping stones that will help both you and your program rise to the next level as you continue to strive for excellence.
Nicole is a Panamanian-American, single mother, workforce development specialist, dancer, motivational speaker and published author of many inspirational note-taking journals including 101 Affirmations for Volunteer Administrators, Non-Profit Leaders and Professional Women. She attended Oral Roberts University on a Division I full-ride track scholarship. After graduating, she founded Step It Up! Inc., a non-profit dance organization. Her experience in sports and entertainment, radio, TV and the performing arts has spanned nearly 20 years covering the Chicago, Houston and Miami markets. She has prepared more than 500 interns to enter the workforce and has inspired crowds upwards of 2000. In 2019 she was listed as one of WLRN’s “Local Women Who Inspire You”, she was selected as one of Legacy Miami’s Most Prominent and Influential Black Women In Business and Industry of 2019 and became a contributing writer for The Life of a Single Mom.
